A man named Dan was a running man with a plan
Who ran by a tan cop standing by in the sand
With a donut in his hand and mouth filled with sharp teeth
Deeply focused on the pastry he was trying to eat…

While the hipster in a sleek suit chin-checked a bird
Who demanded respect, “Call me ‘sir’ or get pecked!”
“Well that’s absurd,” reflected the nerd (who grew up to be fat)
With that sleep walking man who looked oddly like his dad.

But Santa has a box for the feather-necked Pherg,
Who was disturbed by that shlock who tried to beat that sweet bird
If you’re perturbed by this heap of wack peeps on the street
Just take a seat and sit back – you’re in for a treat!